Connecting with Nature never fails to bring me new gifts and insights. Here's a story from the past weekend...
I pulled back from the roar of the rapids on the Ottawa River Saturday morning. I almost wanted to run away!
When I arrived at the river’s shore, the speed and turbulence of the spring flow set off a churning and tumult within me. It echoed a feeling I’d been carrying all week.
In the bursting energy of springtime, I sometimes feel like I’m being carried on a rush of adrenaline as I move ahead with plans and projects. And, there by the river, it felt too fast, too urgent. I wanted to turn and pull away, to immediately quiet my inner “rapids”.
But (hello!) I reminded myself that I know how to move from stress mode to inner calm. (That’s some of the guidance I offer on my walks!) So I stayed there, in the place where my buttons were being pushed.
I closed my eyes … slowed my breathing … focused on the songs of the birds nearby … let the roar of the river recede. Within a few breaths I felt my weight shift, sensed the ground holding me steady, and felt a quiet within.
Quiet enough that I could listen to the story of that internal churning and turn towards it with curiosity.
As I listened, I recalled times of running rapids on canoe trips. I remembered my adrenaline surging as soon as we could hear the rapids, then the intensity and focus on each swift second of time, paddling in sync with my canoe partner to get through safely – or else get dumped into the turbulence.
And I remembered, once we were through the rapids, taking the time to “eddy out.” An eddy is where some water peels off the edges of the fast current and creates a place of calm by the shore. That water then drifts slowly upstream before returning to the channel. In the roller coaster of a whitewater river, we pause in an eddy to catch our breath, get our bearings and secure our gear, before turning to the next challenge.
I got thinking about what I’m carrying in my canoe now. Hard things like the recent deaths of two people dear to me, and a sudden decline in my mother’s health, and wonderful things like getting ready for the launch of a book with my writing in it (see below). No single thing is “huge”, but they’re stacked up and a bit unbalanced. Maybe I get anxious because I worry about getting swamped and losing something important.
That morning, the voice of the river reminded me to pay attention to the fast current, and the energy it requires to navigate it and keep the load afloat. I was reminded that I can eddy out when needed, to bail water, re-balance the load and catch my breath!
Later that day I noticed the calm of the floodwaters that had overflowed from the river. Have you seen how the extra water finds the low places, and rests there? Ah, another way that nature releases the pressure valve!
So much wisdom awaits when we can get quiet and listen with curiosity. There will always be rapids in the seasons of our lives. When they feel like too much, we can find ways to eddy out; to find the low-lying quiet places. And rest.
I warmly invite you to join me on a guided walk, to discover ways to your place of rest and calm listening, whatever you may be carrying in your canoe.